I am a SURVIVOR not a victim........

Kalinka blogged about domestic violence...I continue to fight for people to recognize and realize that domestic violence is an issue and it is in your own community...your backyard...it may even be happening right next door.

Domestic Violence is not only physical, it is mental.  Most often it starts with mental abuse...once the perpetrator has mastered their craft...it can escalate into physical abuse.

There are many reasons why a person can rip themselves from the grip of their perpetrator...fear, financial, refusal to admit there is anything wrong.....

My poem named First explains that happened when I put my self first....loved myself first....realized that I was being mentally abused...when I stood up for myself....I walked away being a stronger woman, knowing that I would never let anyone tell me what I liked, what I was to do....I am my own person...I am a person that has my own likes and dislikes, my own thoughts, my own reasoning....

I find it funny (not in a laughing matter) the way people try to change you after they have been in a relationship with you whether it is a friend, lover....  My comments to them are " you fell in love with me and why are you to trying to change me ... you never knew me ... or you are threatened by me. "

I have been told that I intimidate people... a man told me this .... he said that I intimidate both men and women ... My response to him ... was that was too bad, I feel bad for them .. I have never set out to have people feel that way and that he should have them look to themselves ... I feel they are PROJECTING .... they are projecting their own faults toward me... maybe they see something in me that they thought they had or wish to have.  It is a form of jealousy and I am not going to feed into it.  I am sorry they feel that way.  He then understood that I am not a bad person like they were trying to imply....I accept people for who they are...I don't look for fault or lay blame ... who am I to do that?  I wish people could learn to be that way to others......

I would like to share some of my writings pertaining to domestic violence....and I am not ashamed of what happened to me so ....I share and talk about it with whomever wants to talk...it has helped me heal and continue to heal .......

I have created this google group to share:
http://groups.google.com/group/karmaofthedragonfly